14 Little Things That Look Like Love But Are Actually Manipulation

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8. HE FLATTERS YOU CONSTANTLY. 

A bit of flattery is healthy and makes you feel good, but if your partner’s always charming you, it can be used as a disguise. He wants to throw you off guard and perhaps use the charm to manipulate you at a later stage.

9. HE TELLS YOU WHEN YOU’VE HAD TOO MUCH TO DRINK.

You were at a party together and he told you to stop drinking so much after he saw you having fun with your friends. The reason? He cares about you and doesn’t want you to be badly hungover tomorrow. Thanks, Dad. You know what? Maybe he was pissed off that you were having such a good time because he’s a jealous, insecure jerk.

10. HE TELLS YOU HOW MUCH BETTER YOU ARE THAN OTHER WOMEN.

You might see it as a compliment when he says all his exes were psychotic but you’re so much better than them. Hey, maybe you’re the best woman he’s ever met. These can be compliments, but not if he’s showing signs of being sexist and discriminatory. He might say, “Women are so [insert negative adjective here], but you’re not like them.” Um, hello? You’re a woman! It’s damn insulting.

11. HE LOVES TO JOKE AROUND.

He’ll call you “crazy” or “dumb,” but only in a joking way. He says it’s his way of showing love. Um, no. It’s not. It’s his way of pretending to be joking but hoping that the comments lodge themselves in your mind so that you start to believe them.

12. HE SUGGESTS THINGS “FOR YOUR OWN GOOD.

” He cares about you so much that he’ll show you a better way to do your job, speak to your best friend, make a cup of tea and even lose those extra pounds (that you didn’t even notice). It’s not for your own good at all — it’s his way of controlling you. But screw that, you’re a grown woman who can damn well decide what’s best for you.

13. HE NEEDED TO SEE YOU — THAT’S WHY HE FLIPPED.

Aww, he just couldn’t wait to see you and when you told him that you had to cancel your date, he lost his temper. He quickly apologized, saying that he just missed you so much, and maybe you felt flattered. But warning bells should’ve sounded. Beware of a man who can’t handle being told “no.”

14. HE BECOMES SUPER SWEET AFTER ARGUMENTS.

You had a big fight after which he became loving and sweet. It’s a way to guilt you for confronting him on something that caused the fight. He’s the guy who’ll say, “You misunderstood me,” “I don’t like drama,” or “Is that what you think of me, even though I show you I love you every day?” as a way to make him seem like the sweet, reasonable guy and you like the crazy girlfriend. It’s messed up and you need to get out ASAP.

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